Rap Lyrics Translated
Standard American English translations of Ebonics in contemporary rap and hiphop tunes.
Hilarity ensues.
This one is from BizBag:
LYRICS:
First I talk about how I dress and this
And diamond necklaces – stretch Lexuses
The sex is just immaculate from the back I get
Deeper and deeper – help ya reach the
Climax that your man can’t make
Call and tell him you’ll be home real late
Let’s sing the breakTRANSLATION:
I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars. This is more than enough to convince you to have sexual intercourse with me. I am able to insert my penis further into you when I enter you from behind. Furthermore, you will be able to reach orgasm. I understand this to be a problem with your current sexual partner. He needn’t be concerned about your whereabouts. Please phone him and inform him that you won’t be home for a while. By the way, please sing the chorus of the song for me also.
Legs
Brief synopsis of the day: Nicole, her mother Mary Lee and I went to Provincetown (also called P-Town by the natives) to check it out. It is apparently one of the top gay/lesbian vacation spots in the world. It was a very cool, laid back community, full of talented artists and tourists checking out the laid back Cape Cod life.
We picked up and order of fried dough (which I had never had before, save in its analogous form of beignet) and as we were eating I spied a woman wearing the shortest dress I had ever seen. Well…
Upon closer inspection, “she” turned out to be a he, complete with a spiral lollipop, Hello Kitty handbag and a balding head. (S)he bought a soda and then met up with a friend, who the photograph reveals was a transvestite as well. Check out the calves in the full size photo.
Nude Favorites
Nude Favorites, originally uploaded by romanedirisinghe.
I find it amusing that I uploaded this pic on July 4th, 2005, but it has acquired more than 11,000 hits since then! I owe it all to the tags. It seems that people are totally in search of free smut on Flickr. Tsk, tsk. As a consequence of the general desire for porn, this is now my most viewed pic in my photostream.
This is a collection of my nude favorites, created by other photographers on Flickr. None of these pictures are actually mine.
To those of you visiting from the Flickr site, consider this an unwelcome study on human sexual behavior. Your visit has been logged. You are not eternally damned, nor are you perverse. This is perfectly normal. Thank you for participating.
Bizarre dreams
I had some weird dreams last night. I was still dating Nicole, but I had decided to take a solo trip to Southeast Asia or Japan or some place. However, I secretly visited the Carribean en route, apparently to hook up with an ex-girlfriend. When I got there (to the Dominican Republic), I had a key to a house (that I had lived in before, apparently), which I used to unlock the front door and enter. Within minutes, the occupants of the house, 3 or 4 college-age women, were freaking out, threatening to call the police. And there I was, scrambling verbally to come up with an explanation for my presence there. Somehow, I convinced them that I was harmless and a friend, and we all went to sleep in our respective beds.
Later, still on the island, I was walking around with Julio when we were approached by a totally hot woman, who was trying to pick both of us up. We vibed, etc, but moved on. Much later, I was alone, and was approached by the woman’s sister, who was a former teacher of mine (but looked totally different). Strange. Anyway, she wanted sex, so I agreed, and as we were walking to her hut, we were passed by her sister. That’s when I realized I was being used as a tool in some bizarre sibling feud or competition. Anyway, I think we got it on… end of scenario.
US laws support inbreeding
Pennsylvania first cousins found a way to tie the knot in Maryland, owing to existing state laws. Further research suggests that half of the states in this country have similar laws. Is that why there are so many stupid Americans? Would this explain the average American’s propensity for large cars and soda pop? You decide.