News for the ‘humor’ Category

Quote of the day

“I want meat & dairy. I’m sick of veggies & carbs.” – Nick Symes

Posted: April 9th, 2005
Categories: blog, humor
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Weekend synopsis

The weekend can be summed up with the following anecdote:

I was at Matan’s Bar Mitzvah, and when it was time to “shower him with sweet things,” I flung my piece of candy as hard as I could, aiming for the front of the room where Matan was. As noble as my intentions were, my body had apparently forgotten how to throw. The piece of candy fell far short of my expectations, instead colliding with the head of an unsuspecting woman. Furthermore, she barely flinched, demonstrating that my throw was especially weak. Lady, whoever you are, I’m really sorry I pegged the back of your noggin with my worse-than-a-girl throw.

Posted: April 3rd, 2005
Categories: blog, humor
Tags: , ,
Comments: 1 Comment.

Pizza order, AKA quote of the day

“Hi, I’d like a cheeseless, flourless pizza with sauce in a green pepper. One breadstick and a big coke.” – Holly Haebig

Posted: March 29th, 2005
Categories: blog, humor
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Peeved

It boggles my mind when very close friends who I haven’t seen in a while tell me they’re going to spend time with me after hour n, and when said hour arrives, they are nowhere to be found.

So, I finally got the call from my dear friend Beth, and she pointed out that I had actually never given her a clear indication that we were supposed to get together after 6 pm. Furthermore, she pointed out that she has never, to date, snubbed me. Yet. (The Barbie/Fuel Cafe incident doesn’t really count, because she did [finally] show up.) I guess I was so needy that I was sure we had made plans. LOL.

Posted: March 27th, 2005
Categories: blog, humor
Tags: , , ,
Comments: 1 Comment.

Play that cowbell

Last night, after I played cowbell with the Static Chicken, some guy came up to me and started ranting to me about Christopher Walken. I raised my right eyebrow, as I had no idea what he was talking about. He then jogged my memory. Apparently, I reminded him of the infamous Saturday Night Live episode featuring Christopher Walken, Jimmy Fallon, Chris Kattan, Will Ferrell, Chris Parnell, and Horatio Sanz doing a skit of a Blue Öyster Cult recording session. Apparently I land among the stars, at least in this guys eyes. Thanks, dude, whatever your name is.

Watch the cowbell skit (WMV)
Listen to MP3s of the sketch

I also found plenty of other articles here | here

Posted: March 23rd, 2005
Categories: blog, humor, music
Tags: , , ,
Comments: 2 Comments.

More on wedgies

Last week, I posted an anecdote about wedgies. The aforementioned initiator of that conversation, Katie, sent me an email informing me that the term “wedgies” had been added to Webster’s Dictionary. May the ignorant finally see the light.
via JS Online

I also found some blogs that reference wedgies, including:

  • Octopuses, wheee! blog, which claims to have found the earliest reference to wedgies in Western literature
  • Shazbot Blog, featuring a tale of wedgie violence
  • Pirate’s Cove offers up Wedgie Awards
  • Posted: March 15th, 2005
    Categories: blog, humor
    Tags: , ,
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    And you thought the “liger” wasn’t real

    This one goes out to all the Napoleon Dynamite fans out there: a REAL Liger!!! | more | and another Liger

    Compare with Napoleon’s liger sketch on various eBay items.

    Also, check out the Preston, Idaho Gift Shop

    And here is another site featuring audio clips from the movie, rated by the site author

    Posted: March 14th, 2005
    Categories: bizarre, humor
    Tags: , ,
    Comments: 1 Comment.

    Quote of the day

    “Uchini hechima ga arimas” (Japanese for “Stroke my back with a loofa sponge”) – KT Rusch

    Posted: March 12th, 2005
    Categories: humor
    Tags:
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    Good weather

    For those of you in the tropics or sub-tropics:
    We are having the greatest weather here in Wisconsin. You should come pay us a visit. Bring me a mango or something.

    Posted: March 11th, 2005
    Categories: humor
    Tags: ,
    Comments: No Comments.

    On the topic of wedgies

    I was sitting at my cube yesterday when I overheard some people talking about wedgies. Not potato wedges, but wedgies, you know, like when someone grabs the back of your underwear and pulls really hard, jamming your underwear in your ass-crack and making your underwear resemble a thong. I had to stifle laughter as several people remarked on how they had no idea what a wedgie was. The initiator of the conversation, a rather open-minded woman, seemed similarly affected, but maintained her composure and didn’t volunteer a definition.

    So I sent her an email today: “I can’t believe people don’t know what a wedgie is.”
    Her reply: “yeah i’m having a hard time grasping that fact as well…”

    Perhaps it’s a Gen-X thing. Maybe we were the only ones who were fortunate enough to fall victim to a wedgie.

    Posted: March 11th, 2005
    Categories: culture, humor
    Tags: , ,
    Comments: 4 Comments.