Prepare to Die
Those who have watched the cult film, The Princess Bride, may remember the following quote:
Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father: prepare to die.
Is is odd that it came to mind as I was reading a BBC article on a Somali execution?
Exquisite Corpse #1
This is an Exquisite Corpse, a collaborative work from 2002 or 2003. Each line represents a new author.
Benny sat down on the park bench, observing the pigeons taking shits in front of him.
And then he died.
He came back alive!
He ran around the room screaming, “Yipee!”
And tripped over the footstool and broke his leg.
Since the break was a compund fracture, the man made a makeshift splint out of popsicle sticks and dust bunnies.
With the splint in place, he made his way through the forest, and drove 23 miles to the aid station.
The drill sergeant asked, “What happened?”
Squirrel Crossing
I beheld a strange sight today. Squirrels usually pick the most random locations along a road to cross, and often with dire consequences. I’ve witnessed many a squirrel meeting the wheels of a passing Cadillac with a crunch.
Not today, however. With my own eyes I beheld a squirrel using the crosswalk. I was approaching a stop sign, and a squirrel walked onto the road as I drove up. He was watching me carefully, and tenaciously made his way across the road. When he got to the other side, he looked at me as if to say, “Didn’t I do a great job?”
I said, “Good job,” and drove home, thinking how great it would be if all squirrels could cross like that. It totally breaks my heart to see animals run over.
Self-Tuning Guitar
Ryan forwarded me a cool link to an article about a self-tuning guitar. I took one look at the demo video (which featured Graham Nash popping wood) and I popped some serious wood. For a meager $3,000, one can get the Transperformance system installed in your guitar. Tuning takes place within one second - you can actually hear the guitar strings changing tension. True, it’s a bit hi-tech, but for the musician who needs 15 guitars backstage to accomodate different tunings, this would come in quite handy. How could you go wrong with something endorsed by Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin fame?
Rick Wakeman’s Yamaha C5 Grand Piano on eBay
Progressive rock fans rejoice! Rick Wakeman’s Yamaha Grand Piano is up for sale on eBay. This is allegedly the instrument that he used on the 70’s tours. Comes with a custom built flight case. At $19,500, how could you pass this up?